For the last two months, I have been apart of four weddings, two of them were my brothers. Tony married Jen, and my younger brother Bryan married Jenni and coming this December 18th my older brother Erick will marry Jen. All of a sudden the Rouanzoin clan has tripled in size! In the midst of weddings, bachelor parties, engagement parties and rehearsal dinners I have had some time to reflect on what it means to be married and what it means to have a healthy marriage.
Alex and I have gone through a lot the last two and a half year: multiple moves, job changes, career changes, serious health issues, parental shifts and dynamics, traveling, differentiation and of course planting a church. Now, more than anything else, our ability to communicate [even if it was loud] has helped us learn how to live together, share life together and love each other well. We definitely don’t have it figured out all the way yet, I’m sure that won’t ever be the case even 50 years from now. But, in the midst of all that we have done over the past few years, I can truly say my marriage is the greatest gift to me. Taking the time to reflect and truly sit in awe of the miracle of marriage and this blessed sacrament, I wrote a small something for my brothers to encourage their marriage. It’s short and sweet.
My advice for you in your marriage: always fight.
May you fight for intimacy, when it’s easier to pull away
May you fight for communication, when it’s easier to keep silent;
May you fight for time, when it’s easier to fill up the calendar,
May you fight for submission, when it’s easier to get your way.
May you choose to love. Everyday. Remember that Love is a choice.
You wake up everyday and choose love, let love be your choice.
May you choose to let things go, let things be, and find yourself in
the choice to love.
May you fight for intimacy, when it’s easier to pull away
May you fight for communication, when it’s easier to keep silent;
May you fight for time, when it’s easier to fill up the calendar,
May you fight for submission, when it’s easier to get your way.
May you choose to love. Everyday. Remember that Love is a choice.
You wake up everyday and choose love, let love be your choice.
May you choose to let things go, let things be, and find yourself in
the choice to love.
For my brothers, and their wives! I love you guys.
May you be poor in misfortune Rich in blessings
Slow to make enemies Quick to make friends
But rich or poor, quick or slow,
May you know nothing but happiness from this day forward
